'Media Fasting and Not: A Comparison' or 'The Aftermath'

After a full week of 'no media' followed by nearly a month of 'not media fasting' I have come to several conclusions.

There is a sentence in Created to Be His Helpmeet that made me laugh out loud -

"The scriptures tell young women to be keepers at home because of their natural tendency to loaf around doing nothing except seeking entertainment."

She goes on to say that modern technology has created a means to both be at home and neglect your role as a keeper of the home via various forms of social media, phones, etc. I agree, I have always agreed, but I didn't notice that the 'good' things I use my laptop for can also distract from truly fulfilling my job as wife and mother. Some examples:

Cookbooks vs Google, etc. - My cooking style and choices were decidedly better during our media fast. I dug into my cookbook cupboard and pulled out three different books at a time, comparing and seeing other options in the process. They were like old, neglected friends. After the fast, I went back to my pinterest boards and quick searches. I don't think either method is inherently better or worse, but for me it was the difference in committed and quality concentration or haphazard guesses and cut corners.

Chores, children and diversions - Consider this 5 minute wedge of my day:

Start the dishwasher and head towards the laundry room. Encounter adorable screeching monkey via crash course in the hall. Allow said creature to haul me by the hand somewhere indistinct. She either forgets or changes her mind halfway there. We read a book instead. I hop up way before poor Erin is ready to let me go because there are mounds of things I have to do and it's stressing me out to neglect it one more second. Not wanting to leave my daughter to her own devices I scoop her up and plan to include her help. Which means it's going to take longer, and more effort, and I'll have to choose the next task according to what she can do or at least sort of do. Once we get set up, Oliver wakes. He eats, burps, get's changed and cooed at. Rinrin needs lunch now, and then a nap. Oliver is getting pacifier spoiled, so I have to spend some extra time putting him down. Who should go to sleep first? One or the other will cry from sleepiness, so I have to consider that...

My philosophy of lists and schedules is rapidly changing. It's risky to commit my expectations to any one plan of action too firmly. I have to mentally shrug off my OCD tendencies and remember that loving and therefore training my children comes first. This means that means the continuous stream cleaning and cooking and doing everything in 'order' was sacrificed long ago. During our media fast I think we all pulled this off pretty well! Gliding from housekeeping to playing to teaching to training felt focused and purposeful.'Post media fast' I see how sometimes my internet activity competes with the precious moments I spend wiping noses and playing with train tracks. I use my laptop for things like grocery lists, selling unused items, and research. I think the stress in these situations comes from sheer quantity of competing priorities and activities and trying to do them all at once.

Influences and priorities - We were watching a tv show awhile back. A man said, "I'm a textbook people pleaser, it's a problem." Ben laughed at me as I squirmed indignantly under the accusation. But it's true. I can sooooooometimes struggle with how the gigantic 'me, myself and I' is perceived. I'm super competitive. I want to do everything better than everyone all the time. I can't stand it if someone disapproves of anything about me or mine. I'm sweet, compliant, understanding -- until I think you find yourself better than me and there is nothing I will not do to either change that or defend myself. I'm working on it.

This isn't limited to people I know. There are thousand of women who have kindly shared their successes and 'after' photos vie the internet. I thought I was researching, finding inspiration, when I was in fact competeing. With the whole stinkin' world. I think this explains why a media fast was such a freeing experience for me. Alone with my home and my family there were so many less voices. It was quiet enough to see what was good for us and what wasn't important.

The Feehan family is setting in motion a generation of people and experiences. We are in our own small way creating history. I want it to be the best kind of history, the kind of story that inspires by success and victory and truly worthy undertakings. I consider my job as wife, mother and teacher important enough to make or break it. Every day is an experiment, an adventure. Each day builds into a week, a month, an entire year made up of the people I love and the choices we've made. Changes are in order but they will be worth it.

Teething

My sweet Erin was so sad this morning. Her teeth are hurting her and she's a bit feverish so everything is  more emotional than it should be. For example, earlier I heard her wailing desperately for help in the hallway. When I flew to her aid and asked what she needed the only answer I received was one tiny, trembling finger pointing at some applesauce, dribbled down the front of her shirt.

I am sympathetic, having recently rediscovered what monthly hormones feel like.

Oliver is also teething. His first tooth! 3 months seems a bit young but I also started cutting my teeth at that age so possibly it is a family thing.

In between the chores and baby coordinating I've been reading up on Charlotte Mason. I'm so completely excited to provide the best education possible for my children. The deeper I delve the more I feel like I ought to send myself back to some form of school first.

Ambleside online offers their free annotated version of Charlotte Mason's books here. I'm thinking a steady read through of these will be a great place to start.

In other news, Ben has just started an author's blog called, The Ragman Has a Packrat. It's already great. :)

After work this evening, we all flopped on the floor for a pre-bedtime play session. Oliver joined, small though he is.

I hold to the theory that he is a boy and therefore tough and can handle things. I mean -- look at him. Not even phased (even though I was pretty sure his life was in danger). 

Media Fast January 2014 - Part 2

I enjoyed feeling so secluded during our media fast. It was nice, relying on my cookbooks rather than Google, comparing my housekeeping to yesterday rather than some perfect photo. The phone rang once or twice, surprising me with the reminder that other people still existed. 

I had this moment, standing at my kitchen sink. The blinds were all the way open and Erin and I were singing at the top of our lungs. For the first time in awhile I was perfectly content to wash the dishes. Joyful, even. I didn't have something else I needed to do, or somewhere else to be. In that moment my purpose and goal was to make MY kitchen clean and pretty with MY daughter. It felt like I was a kid again, powering through my chores so I could fly out the door and run with the wind.

Some days were hard. Many times if we had not been on our media fast, I would have called it a day after a rough moment which was after a rough night which was after a rough...everything. By which I mean we would have watched Winnie the Pooh in our pj's because mom needed a break. Instead I prayed a lot more, drank lots of coffee, and took a ridiculous amount of deep breaths. A routine developed, and I guess I don't need as many 'breaks' as I thought I did. Pushing through is really rewarding. Do Hard Things? Psh. Hard things are my life.

This media fast was wildly successful.

~ Priorities have been re-evaluated. 

~ I slowed down. Sometimes the world is too fast for me. There are so many ways to be efficient, so much information to absorb and implement, so many good ideas and ideals -- who has the energy for ALL of that? Maybe I'm just old fashioned.

~ We've established that Sundays will be quiet days. We will unplug and focus inward. That way, weeks won't have gone by without any downtime. No more burning out for me.

~ I hung my clock!! And a photo frame!! This is actually a big deal.

~ Erin's involvement in household things basically doubled, and it seems to be sticking. This is happy.

~ My Mister got a ton of reading done, and made huge progress on his book planning. Guys! His book is going to be amazing! Interesting fact -- we thought of the original idea together, at night, in bed, just before falling asleep. It felt silly and just for fun at the time. It has obviously come a long way since then, but I'm still claiming Muse rights.

~ I also did a lot of reading, and have kept it up since. I used to devour books by the dozen. I'm glad to be back in the game.

~Also, blogging...that's going well.

~ I'm getting more creative with my days. Not so point and shoot. I like how things have taken a bit more of a meandering course.

~ 'Nurturing' isn't always my strong point, but that's improving. Probably a result of a combination of much of the above.

I suspect that a passion for nature and my original under-exposure to modern technology has played key in my need for occasional space and silence. I don't hate our handy modern tools, I'm just me. If I had it my way I'd live in a terrarium. There would probably be flower fairies. We would eat off wooden utensils and drink water from a spring. Since I'm also happy to live in the real world, I'm grateful to know more about my limits, and propensities and potential than I did before our Media Fast. Thanks Mister, for going along with it. Thank you Lord for sound wisdom, laid up in heaven for me and mine. 

/photo credit goes to uncovet.com/

Media Fast January 2014 - Part 1

My husband has occasionally teased me for being a Luddite at heart. Apparently that means I hate technology, or something. It's true, my fondest memories usually take me back to a time where I guess it was always summer, and warm, and full of adventure and discovery and usually no electricity. I remember the best chore days happening to the tune of one of our two CD's (if I had managed to convince mom to let me play it that day) with all the windows open. Preferably the neighbors (aka our best family friends) would be running in and out, and Dad would decide to work on OUR house instead of his construction job.

I remember learning how to use a computer when I was much older than my friends. It was strange and off limits and overwhelming. Sometimes I just sat there with my hand on the mouse, stricken with all the possibilities and unable to choose even one. High school debate happened (so much research), and Facebook (so much sneaking around) but usually in closely and suspiciously monitored quarters. Then I grew up and moved out and freedom was mine.

I'm ridiculously careful of my time, my responsibilities. I care so much and I try so hard, that 'burnt out' is becoming a perpetual state of being. Freedom, right? Despite all this, my home and life are not even close to meeting my own standards. Sometimes it feels like I can only be successful with one thing at a time, I have to fail everywhere else to make it work. I've spent entire days trying to figure out what's wrong. I love being a mother, a wife. Home is my favorite place to be. I have a lot of fun planning how to make our lives run more smoothly. So what's up? I've come to numerous conclusions the past two years, most of them excuses.

This January my family took one week for a media fast. So, so worth it. I've asked for this before, hoping vaguely that some sort of evil influence or time sucker would suddenly be absent and all problems solved.

Well, something happened.

In the past, we've gone partially 'media' free. This time, It was a little bit like stepping behind an iron curtain. I sat haughtily on my side waiting for productivity to soar in the absence of my enemy while facebook, pinterest, gmail, spotify, blogger, netflix, various informative/inspirational sites, and everything else continued on without me.

~ ~ ~

Maker's Diet Breakfast: Phase I

According to the plan we selected (male potato type) there are three breakfast options during Phase I. We won't do everything perfectly, since I'm still suffering from sticker shock with the raw honey, raw milk for kefir, everything organic and free, etc. I plan to let these things sort of sneak up on me, all  subtle and inexpensive-like.

1. Eggs and fruit

3 Eggs cooked however you like in coconut oil
Sauteed Mushrooms, onions and bell peppers
1 serving of grapes

2. Smoothie

Plain whole milk Yogurt or Kefir
Coconut oil
Frozen Berries
Honey
Vanilla extract (opt.)
Protein Powder (opt.)

3. Yogurt

Yogurt with honey and fruit
Handful of raw almonds

Breakfast happens to be my weak spot, especially on the weekends. What's been working so far is to just boil up a bunch of eggs every few days, and eat those with some fruit, or a smoothie if I'm feeling optimistic (I'm bad at smoothies. It never works out.). Hard boiled eggs seem to be my best bet for actually accomplishing breakfast, which is to say, it's absolutely no work at all and really hard to mess up.

As far as how the diet in general is going....

Meh.

But that's okay. I suspect some of my issues with being unable to resist cravings stem from being pregnant two years in a row. During this time, myself and everyone else stuffed me full of whatever I wanted, whenever I wanted it. I /really/ like how this diet works, the types of meals I've been making lately. Once we get some consistency, it will be even better.

Some positive things I've noticed already:

~Waking up has been a teeny bit easier

~Detox happened once or twice, but it wasn't very intense

~My people seem a little healthier. We've got mold in the house, and dust, not enough sunshine or fresh air, some family health issues, and a history of sort-of bad eating. Just a week or two of  intentional dieting and we're eliminating some of that 'generally always sick' feeling. Yay!

Circulatory Herba-Smoothie - Bulk Herb Store

Something I'll be adding to our breakfast on a daily basis once it comes, is the Circulatory Herba-Smoothie mix from the Bulk Herb Store. The idea of the herba-smoothies is that you'd be making and eating your own supplements/vitamins. I'm all for that -- the effective supplements in the stores are really expensive and hard to come by. This particular mix contains rosehips and ginkgo, both of which I've wanted for a long time! Also, there is a suggested smoothie recipe. Here's hoping I can finally get it right.

Erin, 20 Months

Erin, my sweet girl,

Now you are almost two, and you have been loudly proclaiming your identity to the world for some time already. I can hardly see a trace of the infant or baby anymore. It's getting easier to look down the road, and see the woman we've been training you to be. With a new brother in the house, I can tell how much your daddy and I learned from you...sometimes I'm worried about lost opportunities, but then I remember that I am also an oldest daughter. You and I will have a special relationship because of it. You will be strong. We will be best friends.

Your daddy and I are so proud of you because:

~ You have your own tiny broom and vacuum, and can take care of the floors with mommy.

~ You love your baby brother and give him kisses all the time.

~ Your favorite game to play on your own is 'going bye-bye' with your best baby doll. This one will get easier after you've learned how to handle all the buckles, straps, laces and corners involved.

~ You are learning to count! 3 is about as high as it gets right now, and the best part for mommy is that you understand the concept as well as how to mimic the sounds.

~ Right now you learn best with a combination of sign language and instruction. I think you feel like we're not putting enough effort into it if our hands are still.

~ Being read to is cause for celebration. We've got to be mindful of our timing because you will ask for book, after book, after book...

~ Cartoons were made especially for daddy and Rinrin. You guys have your own special show, and it's perfect for cuddling and exchanging astonished expressions when something cool happens.

~ You are almost completely fearless as long as daddy and mommy are around.

~ 'Dance' is your favorite sign, and you've got a hair trigger for breaking out into wiggly, bouncy dance sessions.

~ You take the garbage out with daddy, and consider it a serious responsibility.

~ The kitchen counters and drawers belong to you during cooking times. You know which ones are allowed, and you know exactly what to do with them. There have been several meals with your special touch added to things.

~ You love blueberries /so/ much that you are willing to put aside all prejudice in their name. You forged new friendships with your Grandpa and great Grandma based upon the power of the blue berry.

Launch of the Maker's Diet

My mom and I will be joining forces as we attempt to subject our families to a very simple, yet rigorous diet change. The Maker's Diet for Weight loss has been sitting on my Kindle bookshelf unused for almost 1 year, but I think having a partner in crime should prove motivating and fun. :)

Each phase is supposed to last 4 weeks, but I'm going to move things along much faster and cut that in half for the sake of actually sticking to it. We're in Phase I now, the cleansing phase. Per my new years resolution, I'm not going to count our mistakes so far as 'not starting yet'. I'm just going to keep pushing forward.

Confession time-- I never actually told Ben what I was doing. Or when I was doing it. Or any of the rules. Because I've discovered that when it comes to my sweet, loving hubby who just wants a piece of pizza, I am a major wimp. Which is different than a normal wimp. So my explanation for suddenly developing a desire to do all the grocery shopping by myself (sort of) with great excitement was simply that Mom and I are doing a 'thing'. A thing? Yep, a thing.

But I'm pretty sure he knows by now.

Quick note:

Frittatta's are super awesome and my daughter loves them. Ben doesn't, but that's okay because he likes Salmon and steamed Broccoli apparently. Hopefully there will be photos and recipes soon.

Toddler Safe Herbal Remedy for Skin Rash

Mother and Child - Xi Pan

According to Steven H. Horne, author of the ABC Herbal for Children, the three phases of herbal treatment and prevention in children is as follows:

ACTIVATE or energize the system; BUILD the body's immunity; and CLEANSE.

I kept this formula in mind while treating a very nasty rash that appeared on my one year old's lower back almost a week ago and had amazing success! Here is a summary of my new favorite Rash Regimen...

Since the rash didn't seem to fit the profile of any common skin problems I could find in my research and didn't stick around long enough to go to the doctor, we never diagnosed whether it was fungal, bacterial, or viral. This made me very uncomfortable, since I felt like I couldn't tailor my treatment to the specifics of the issue. I decided to give myself two weeks to take care of the problem before we at least went in for a diagnosis (I think it's a good idea to determine a timeline for yourself while utilizing home treatment methods just to be safe and keep yourself balanced. I'm probably a bit more jumpy now than I will be in a few years).

Garlic Bath: Once a day or more, I made a large batch of garlic tea to add to Erin's bathwater. She sat in there for at least 30 minutes at a time.

Peppermint/Yarrow Salve: After every bath I rubbed Erin down with an herbal salve of yarrow, coconut oil, and peppermint. In a pinch, pure coconut oil would have worked pretty well.

Tea Tree/GFS extract external application: Using a fresh Q-tip we all made sure to swab the affected area several times a day with a diluted solution of Tea Tree Oil and Grapefruit Seed Extract.

Fresh Ginger: I added fresh ginger to pretty much every dinner meal for about three days (Stir fry, soup, fried rice, etc. Ginger is pretty versatile.)

And that's it! As far as diet goes, I just generally tried to keep her away from sugars and white flour, while making our meals as healthy as I could without stressing about it too much. In less than one week Erin's dark rings and tired, whiny behavior went away, as well as the alarmingly gross looking rash that had begun to spread up her back by the time I noticed it.

I'm really excited about treating the WHOLE body, building it's strength and immunity so that it can heal itself. This was one of my first tests/experiments, and I feel like it went really well! I'll will continue to update our progress, and I also plan to review the book, The ABC Herbal, by Steven Horne, in the near future.

Book Review: Making Babies, by Shoshanna Easling

It's finally here! My end of pregnancy motivation has been delivered, devoured and thoroughly obsessed over. Longed for since pregnancy #1, I actually broke down and bought myself a copy of  The Making Babies Book.

The Making Babies Series is a book and DVD set that follows Shoshanna Easling through the pregnancy and home birth of her daughter. For now I only have the book, which I've been reading through and implementing over the past few weeks, and I'm ready to share my thoughts.

Shoshanna Easling owns the Bulk Herb Store, which is my go-to resource when I need to stock up or want to try something new. Every article she's written has been very informative, and her herbal concoctions that are sold online are way out of my league. Everything she touches exudes confidence, beauty and FUN. I have always been impressed and inspired by her work.

First I'd like to say that when my book arrived it wasn't exactly what I'd anticipated. I wasn't disappointed, but I was definitely surprised. I had been expecting a guide, and I would have to say that the book is more of a pregnancy reference for meals, natural remedies, herbal concoctions, etc. without a lot of explaining. I'm guessing you get a deeper, more instructional perspective if you also buy the videos.

Pro's

Scattered throughout the entire thing are beautiful photos of Shoshanna, her family, babies and yummy food! It's all very colorful and inspiring. I think one of the reasons she does this is to show you how lovely pregnancy and everything it entails can be. Some days I found it encouraging just to flip through the pictures.

Every single meal, dessert, snack, and beverage recipe included is healthy and nutritious. When you read the ingredients you get the feeling that not only is this 'safe' to eat while pregnant, it's also going to do something very specifically beneficial for you and your baby.

There is a nice balance between very involved recipes that will probably require a trip to the specialty store (both herbal and food-wise) and very practical, simple ones that you can whip up without a lot of planning.

I've always had a hard time finding motivation to exercise during pregnancy. Her tips and instructions were simple, achievable and few, so I've found myself incorporating them daily. This is happy!

The informative section near the back is very straightforward. If you don't want to hear that nursing is the best choice or how minimal intervention is the safest route, I would suggest not reading that section. She's not bossy, she's just stating the facts of her research without apology.

I love the section for natural home cleaning and beauty care! I didn't expect to see it there, but I suppose it makes sense if you're going for an all natural pregnancy.

Con's

It definitely helped to have some general knowledge of all things natural and herbal. I could see myself being very overwhelmed with the information and suggestions even just 6 months ago.

I noticed several instances where an ingredient, tip or remedy was included without an actual explanation for why it would be beneficial. I did the research and always ended up agreeing with the suggestion, but the point is that I had to go find out for myself. Someone with more experience might not have that problem, and maybe I'm just picky, but it is something I noticed right away.

My brain did not want to accept the layout of the book. It felt too disorganized for easy research and planning purposes. It works and is very artsy, I just would have preferred something a bit more concrete.

There was less information about the actual birthing process than I had anticipated. It's mostly pre-pregnancy and the three trimesters.

~~~

I'm very pleased with my purchase (on Amazon for about $10 less than her website, btw), because I'm an all natural, herbal kind of girl, and I'm currently feeling extra capable of a super 'granola' lifestyle. I'm aware, however, that the book/material isn't for everyone. Feel free to ask for more details!

(Book is available at http://www.bulkherbstore.com/Making-Babies and Amazon.)

A Good Morning

I was gloriously lazy this morning.

• I charged my visiting Sister in Law with making breakfast while I sat stubbornly on the edge of my rocking chair nursing a cough and runny nose. Her smoothies turned out way better than mine ever do.

• My husband de-wrinkled (Not ironed, we don't do that any more. Instead we have a complicated 'wet it down and toss in the dryer' method) his own work clothes and had to fend for himself in the department of clean underwear.

• Erin (My 1 year old)  was left to the care of our resident injured puppy who did a marvelous job of keeping her both entertained and terrified in almost equal measure.

• I turned my nose up at the mere thought of kicking my butt into gear and addressing Hurricane Feehan which had ravished my home sometime in the night. I swear--it didn't look like that when I went to bed.

• During breakfast, I sat in the comfiest chair and read a book. I had whipped cream in my coffee and there was no way I was reheating it three times before finishing.

All in all, it was a successful morning. The only blip occurred when my brother in law came to the door 15 minutes earlier than expected. Eye contacted was avoided until we both realized the living room was probably even messier than I was.

Now I'm back to doing not much of anything until I absolutely have to.

Actually, this sort of morning should be happening more often than it does. I'm in my 7th month of pregnancy and finally realizing I probably ought to slow down. Little Oliver James will forgive me if he comes without the baseboards having been scrubbed or the furniture spot cleaned. Erin, my beautiful, bright eyed, brilliant little baby needs my hugs and cuddles which are not always available if I've pushed myself to the limits.

I'm thankful for a husband who would fly over the moon to give me good things like rest and good cheer and nights out with no cooking. It's time to start cashing in! I want to be a happy, healthy, balanced mama with time to love and enjoy life. 

~~~